Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Prose Poem: Feels Like A Lie

Oh Lord, why? Why did she do it? Why would she give the one gift you gave her to someone else? It had a purpose; she had a purpose. But what now?
What's left of her?
She feels like she's less than she was meant to be. But she doesn't know how to pull herself out of the wreck she's in. 
Is she to just go on knowing she made the wrong choice? She feels nothing but regret.
Clothed in a blanket of depression.
Everything she stood for is gone. She has always known you, always walked with you, but Lord she lost herself. This wasn't what she wanted. She just wanted to be his everything. 
She longed to be his world. 
His love. 
When he said he'd always love her she thought it was worth it.
But where is he now? Gone, just like everyone else, but she gave him something that wasn't hers to give. It belonged to someone else, someone who would stay with her forever.
And now she's stuck. In the middle of a never ending maze, and can't find the way out. 
It's dark, and cold. She's fading into the darkness like a rolling fog. 
She needs to feel her way out because she's blinded by evil. All she sees is her mistake in him, the one thing she thought she'd love forever. There needs to be a shimmer of light at the never ending hallways, just to know You will be there when she's ready.
Her haven has been taken over, she's stranded on a island, forgetting what she once had. She stands in the eye of a hurricane and she's pushed to the ground. When she tries to stand up, she can't hold her ground. 
She's withering away with the island. 
In the moment all she saw was gray and she gave herself away. Her parents always talk about what she'll become, but they don't know who she is anymore. She doesn't know who she is anymore.
Sleep isn't an option the nightmares keep her up, she's haunted by her past.
Her life will forever be in chaos. She isn't whole for she lost a part of herself when he left. 
She gave everything to be his everything. There's nothing left of her.
No one said love was easy.   

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